Daryn Bunce Stylianopoulos (’03)

Pastor of Faith Formation and the Arts: First Baptist Church in Newton
Co-founder: The Welcome Table

Boston, MA
WFU Class of 2003
Majors: Music and Anthropology

DeacLink: Please walk me through your path from graduation day to your current job.

Daryn Bunce Stylianopoulos: In 2003, following graduation, I moved to Boston, MA where I have lived for the past twenty years. Boston has been a beautiful home for my family, Spiro Stylianopoulos (‘01), and children Fayrah, Anna and Teddy, and our great dane, Deacon. I am a pastor, ordained in the American Baptist tradition, in fellowship with Alliance of Baptists and Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists. My journey to pastoral ministry and ordination was an unanticipated one; I had not always envisioned myself in a pastoral role. Although, in retrospect, the path was entirely congruent with my passions, and gifts for service and ministry. Frederich Buechner writes, “…if you want to know who you are, watch your feet. Because where your feet take you, that is who you are” (The Alphabet of Grace, 2009). Paying close attention to my feet – to where I found myself time and again – I discerned a calling to ministry. I enrolled at Boston University School of Theology in 2011, and graduated in 2015 with an MDiv. Field education confirmed my call to pastoral service, and since that time I have been serving Baptist congregations in the Boston area. As Senior Pastor of First Baptist Church in Needham, MA, I accompanied their discernment toward their own calling to move toward closing, facilitating and accompanying their recent merger with First Baptist Church in Jamaica Plain toward a new and exciting iteration of ministry in the Greater Boston area. I have remained in a position of pastoral care with First Baptist Church in Jamaica Plain, and am working to develop resources that will assist churches moving through similar journeys of discernment toward good and life-giving endings. Currently I serve as Pastor of Faith Formation and the Arts at First Baptist Church in Newton, where I develop curriculum for our children and youth programming, and facilitate moments of creative engagement with faith through various artistic offerings. In addition to serving these congregations, I have also served as Board President of The American Baptist Churches of Massachusetts, and serve as a Cultural Advocate for Massachusetts Baptist Multicultural Ministries.

Another professional endeavor that I have had the privilege of developing has been The Welcome Table. My sisters and I started The Welcome Table in 2020, in an effort to bridge division and foster respectful dialogue, and inclusive conversation in our communities. We launched an email series of reflections for the liturgical season of Advent that year, accompanied by guiding questions for reflection and engagement. That email series has continued over the past three years, incorporating our own voices, alongside many incredible guest contributors. These reflections and resources have been used by individuals and families, community conversation groups (religious and secular), and churches and other faith-based institutions for helping to facilitate conversation across difference around actual dinner tables for engaging conversation, in congregational church settings, and in community spaces for times of discussion.

Since our start in 2020, we have self-published three books – the first book was developed from our original email series, Advent at The Welcome Table, and from there we developed two accompanying books, Advent Table Talk (a daily journal and discussion guide) and Advent at the Kids Table. This summer we released a free “on-the-go” curriculum series for individuals and families to use during their travels called The Traveling Table, available through our website. In addition, we have created a free eBook that is available to all who visit our website, focusing on “Five Things to Remember When Setting Your Own Welcome Table”. This eBook suggests five main ideas to incorporate (belovedness, vulnerability, connectedness, listening, and welcoming), accompanied by practical suggestions designed to guide you in setting a welcoming space in your own context.

Our communities are still looking for ways to bridge the divisions and polarization, and we feel as though our work is just getting started. It is our hope to continue providing future books and guides for respectful conversation and dialogue, to expand our curriculum offerings for churches and community groups, and to offer podcasts and retreat opportunities for folks interested in experiencing and learning to create welcoming and respectful spaces for dialogue.

Our goal at The Welcome Table isn’t that everyone agrees or thinks the same way, it is that we help create opportunities for people to share their experiences and differences respectfully – so that when we have hard conversations, we don’t exacerbate divisions over our differences, but rather create space to honor one another across them. This is where healing begins. This is where change can happen. This is what we believe loving one another looks like, and where we believe God calls us – to offer space for deeper understanding, and to honor and celebrate one another for the many ways that we are unique and different.

DL: How much did your studies and general experience at Wake inform or drive your career path?

DBS: Wake Forest offered opportunities for me to deeply interrogate and expand my faith perspectives in respectful dialogue with other students and professors; those conversations and experiences broadened my understanding of God and the breadth of God’s compassion and inclusive love, and allowed me to more fully appreciate the beauty of interfaith dialogue and engagement. I also learned through observation of the staff and campus leadership, the importance of intentionally creating and holding space for community in the midst of grief, fear, and uncertainty in the wake of 9/11. These skills have accompanied me into my ministry, and interfaith community work, facilitating respectful spaces of dialogue, holding vigil together in community, and working toward spaces of solidarity and justice keeping. Music is a part of all that I do – music does wonders in bringing folks together across difference, creating palpable moments of meaning-making, and a sense of the sacred for vigil-keeping, prayer, and moments of healing, and for bonding hearts in solidarity and accompaniment around matters of justice and faith; it is a connecting and healing force. I am grateful for the ways I was challenged toward a greater appreciation of culture, of healing and meaning-making in the context of community, and an even greater love for music and its power to bring people together toward new possibility.

DL: How did you find and apply to the various positions you’ve held? Any tips or suggestions for the student audience on networking, interviewing and applying for jobs?

DBS: Most of my professional positions have been acquired through faith-based denominational relationships and processes. However, I am one to believe that the connections that we make – wherever and however they happen can be seeds of potential promise and possibility. I love creative collaboration; making connections with others and for others – toward new projects and creative promise is a joy-full thing. you never know what will blossom from even seemingly mundane interactions, even failed interviews (those can lead to new and better opportunities). Think of each person, each moment, as hope-filled and full of possibility. Even if things don’t work out the way we imagine them, something new and beautiful can come of our attempts, of our courage, of our respectful and creative engagement and imaginings with one another.

DL: What is your favorite part of living and working where you do?

DBS: Boston is an incredible hub for the integration of faith, art, and justice. There’s plenty happening on the grand scale – we have amazing museums and concerts one can visit or attend – art is everywhere here. I tend to find inspiration in the work of community artists and Open Studios spaces, Porchfests, and open mics. Recently I have been inspired by a friend who has begun to perform in small venues for the first time in many years – she’s singing jazz again with a collection of musicians who just love making music together. I think it’s beautiful when art is organic and from a place of real passion and heart. I have recently taken up pottery as a hobby and so a lot of my interest these days is in ceramics and the endless possibilities of learning new methods and forms.

DL: What is your favorite part about where you work?

DBS: I love being surprised by people – by their courage, their willing attempts to make the world better right where they are, by their willingness to be flexible and change, to be creative and to imagine new ways of being church, of being in community together, and their care and compassion for one another.

DL: What and where is next for you?

DBS: I’m open to possibility, but feel I am right where I need to be at present.

DL: Any other kernel of advice you’d like to impart to the readers?

DBS: Be an encourager, not a discourager. This is the advice I have given my children, and that they quote me on. Be an encourager to those around you – empower them to be their best selves (and this applies to yourself as well); encourage others toward life-giving goodness, toward the recognition of their own belovedness.